There comes a time when one can't hide who she is anymore....
This is that time....
Time that I tell the world...
.
And maybe --<sniff>--Just maybe! <fist to mouth stifling a sob> --
I can help others like me.
I have no idea how people will react to the following, but it's a sacrifice I must make for future generations:
I am tired of smudges on the side of my hand because pen manufacturers cannot manage to make a non smudgeable ink. Who decided we should write from left to right anyway? Isn't it interesting that write and right are homonyms?
I am tired of injuring myself using simple kitchen tools like peelers or spilling on my dress trying to manage a ladle.
What are you right handers so afraid of? Is it that you use the left side of the brain, so you aren't in your right mind? So what? The term right mind is prejudicial anyway. It should be correct mind. <Rubbing my chin with my left hand in a musing manner> Ohhhh...no wonder you righties are so afraid. You're in your wrong mind.
Still. Did you know that left in Latin is sinistro? Mm hmm, as in sinister.Yes, I orient left, but I'm just like anybody else in this world. I love. I laugh. I cry. I put on my pants one leg at a time. I just start with the left leg.
I know lefties have made great strides. Lefties are no longer forced to learn to write with their right hand. Left handed scissors have been around for quite a while now. A right hander was able to get beyond my leftiness and marry me. Fact is, there are many married couples who are different handed. And finally, the forks in a proper table setting goes on the left side.
Yet I am often banished to the end of the table so my left elbow doesn't touch the person next to me. I admit my elbows get dry sometimes, but I promise you right handers this: If my elbow touches yours you will not turn into a left hander.
I know my quest for lefty-righty equality will be a long time coming. New traditions using the left hand must become part of of the social norm....Here's one idea...Since we normally shake hands with our right hand, Let’s start high 5-ing with our left hand! Don’t forget to watch the elbows!
This is that time....
Time that I tell the world...
.
And maybe --<sniff>--Just maybe! <fist to mouth stifling a sob> --
I can help others like me.
I have no idea how people will react to the following, but it's a sacrifice I must make for future generations:
I am left handed.
There it is! In big bold red. I was born left handed. It was not a choice. Without doing any research, I'm sure that more than 10% of the world's population is left handed. I am not ashamed of being a lefty, but I am tired.
I am tired of smudges on the side of my hand because pen manufacturers cannot manage to make a non smudgeable ink. Who decided we should write from left to right anyway? Isn't it interesting that write and right are homonyms?
I am tired of injuring myself using simple kitchen tools like peelers or spilling on my dress trying to manage a ladle.
What are you right handers so afraid of? Is it that you use the left side of the brain, so you aren't in your right mind? So what? The term right mind is prejudicial anyway. It should be correct mind. <Rubbing my chin with my left hand in a musing manner> Ohhhh...no wonder you righties are so afraid. You're in your wrong mind.
Still. Did you know that left in Latin is sinistro? Mm hmm, as in sinister.Yes, I orient left, but I'm just like anybody else in this world. I love. I laugh. I cry. I put on my pants one leg at a time. I just start with the left leg.
I know lefties have made great strides. Lefties are no longer forced to learn to write with their right hand. Left handed scissors have been around for quite a while now. A right hander was able to get beyond my leftiness and marry me. Fact is, there are many married couples who are different handed. And finally, the forks in a proper table setting goes on the left side.
Yet I am often banished to the end of the table so my left elbow doesn't touch the person next to me. I admit my elbows get dry sometimes, but I promise you right handers this: If my elbow touches yours you will not turn into a left hander.
I know my quest for lefty-righty equality will be a long time coming. New traditions using the left hand must become part of of the social norm....Here's one idea...Since we normally shake hands with our right hand, Let’s start high 5-ing with our left hand! Don’t forget to watch the elbows!
Left handed high 5 to you Alma! Left handers are also more creative and you are definitely proof postive of that!
ReplyDeletePS Gin Gin -- You've had it easy being a righty...:-D
Is your tongue planted in your right or your left cheek? Hmmmmmm?
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous....
ReplyDeleteOh My! Are you really asking me about my cheekual preference? Fine. I have nothing to hide. I cheek left, but on occasions I've been know to cheek right, particularly when I've had a few too many cocktails....
ANd are you, I must presume, drinking those martinis from the glass in your LEFT hand?
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I'm mostly spilling those martinis from the glass in my left hand. Am I the only person in the world that thinks martini glasses are very unwieldy?
ReplyDeleteWhat about those of us that are right handed, but left footed? Can my ambidextrous brain be part of this movement?
ReplyDeleteIf you pass the audition, you sure can Tamara...:-)
ReplyDeleteyou think that's tough ... try being AMBIdexterous and see how strangely people look at you. Lay over the top of a piano and play the keys from the "wrong" end left hand treble and right hand bass. Put a pencil in each hand and have a discussion with yourself (and erase in both directions). Have lots of fun with dangerous power tools. Yah, ambi is scary cool.
ReplyDelete-DG
You sound like the prettiest girl in school complaining about having to choose who her prom date will be to her fat friend. No sympathy for you.
Delete